Posted in Thoughts

Soul Searching

If only, it was as easy as to Eat. Pray. Love. and identify your purpose in life. Or the way it is described in movies and books – take your troubled mind on a trip to the snow capped mountains and you are back as a transformed person. Or just go road tripping across the country with a complete bunch of strangers and suddenly you grow strong and independent.

Vacations and trips don’t work on me. I thought maybe, something as heavy as the loss of a close family member or a huge heartbreak would have some impact on me and steer me.

Nope! Nothing works!

Nothing from fun sleepovers to disappointed looks seem to manage to awaken something in me. I am still questioning my existence on this Earth. I wake up, work, eat, speak to people, participate in the big and small moments of everyone’s life and yet when I go to sleep, I still feel the emptiness of my life ache inside me.

I don’t know when I will stop feeling this way. When I will stop thinking this way.

I don’t even know what is it that I’m searching for. What is it that my soul needs?

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