Things I am apprehensive about post Lockdown

  • Conversations

Conversations in general and small talk in particular. It is going to feel like a first day at school after a really long summer holiday. And the first thing to do will be re-meeting up with people. It will be diving deep into an avalanche of updates about everyone’s life – updates that I am not sure I am personally interested in anymore.

  • Getting adjusted to the ‘new’ routine

Admit it, even though if we try to maintain the same schedule as before the Lockdown, it’s not going to feel familiar. It will definitely take a lot of getting used to for me and I’m worried because I don’t do well with change.

  • Going back to the ‘old me’

I have worked very hard on myself in this Lockdown. And being in contact with only my close people has been working for me. I do not want to get sucked in the daily drama of my old self again. I don’t want to be back on Square One.

Mood diaries #14

I had a meltdown today because I couldn’t find where I had put my notebook.

A very silly reason to break down for, right? But I’m scared that such a small reason could easily break me into pieces.

Because this is certainly not a good sign. The more I actively try to keep myself occupied and stress free, the more my mind seems to be resisting. Like it’s trying to pull me back into our familiar labyrinth of misery.

All this. I’m worried for me. I don’t know what to do. How to stay unhurt. I just don’t know.