​Late night conversations

I don’t know what it is about the night but as soon as I hit the bed, ready to fall asleep, I start analyzing my day. And that’s when myriad of emotions flash through me. Sometimes it’s just hard to pick one so I suppress them all, sometimes all of them get focused into one emotion and wreak havoc in me. 

Maybe it is this emotional upsurge in me at this time of the night but late night conversations tend to bring out a different version of myself. A more honest me. When I’m ready to pour out all the thoughts and feelings that I pressed for later during the day. 

Something about the late hour makes me let my guard down. And if I’m in a conversation with u so late, when the lights in my house have gone down, it means I really want to be with you right now. I want to share my thoughts with you. I care for you and I appreciate you being with me at this very moment. Because I needed the care right now. 

I feel more calm at this hour then I ever felt during the day. I feel at ease breathing through the quiet in the house. And I feel a load lifted from my heart by sharing my feelings. 

There have been only two people for whom I have ever stayed up late to chat. And I thank you both for being with me throughout. Ur support makes me sleep well at night. 😊


Major Gaurav Arya’s Open Letter

Initially even I was of the opinion that banning artists because of some terrorists is unfair. I sat through a whole Arnab Gosawmi debate but did not understand the viewpoint. Dad failed to explain it to me too. But after reading Major Gaurav Arya’s letter , my thoughts have opened up to a major extent.

Sharing some excerpts from his letter:

Today, I was part of a panel discussion in JNU, interestingly called “Intellectual Terrorism”. The term is self-explanatory, though wide ranging. I will discuss one type of intellectual terrorism here. The proponents of this type of terror are to found in every walk of life, but the roots of this disease are embedded in some institutions of higher learning. More of that some other time.

Karan Johar wants to know if asking Fawad Khan to go back to Pakistan will stop terror. Mahesh Bhatt joins the chorus by saying “stop terrorism, not talks” implying that we must continue to talk to Pakistan. The cricket board will continue to play matches with Pakistan. Certain business houses will continue to do business with Pakistan. All this, while our soldiers are dying on the border.

Will sending Pakistani artists back, stopping cricket and business with Pakistan actually end terror from Pakistan? No, it most certainly will not. But there is an emotion called solidarity.

You cannot make films, play cricket and do business as if everything is fine, because it is not. It makes the soldier wonder aloud, “Why should I alone bear the weight of conflict?”

This conflict between India and Pakistan is not the soldier’s personal war. He is dying and killing for you and me. Imagine if a soldier walked up to his superior and said, “Sir, while I am dying on the Line of Control, these people are going about as if everything is absolutely fine between the two countries.”  Why should he alone sacrifice for India, when others were making merry?

A soldier will die before the thinks of such treason, but its certainly food for thought, isn’t it?

Patriotism and sacrifice is not the sole responsibility of the soldier.

The United States boycotted the Moscow Olympics in 1980, and the Russians did likewise when they boycotted the Los Angeles Olympics in 1984. This is what happens when national interest is held paramount. And this is what must happen now.

For 70 years, Pakistan has been killing Indian citizens. Are we so inured to the pain of our fellow brethren that making a movie or playing a cricket match takes precedence over a soldier’s mourning home?

18 families have been shattered like glass. Not a word for them by our Bollywood royalty, mind you. But the pain of Fawad Khan’s departure is too much to bear, it seems. A tweet in support of Pakistani artists is mandatory. What matters are day and night matches between India and Pakistan.

And the soldiers? Well, as far as they are concerned, they are on another planet, far removed from the glitzy Bollywood studios, and the teak paneled walls of the stately boardrooms of the BCCI. The blood, the mud, the screams and the exploding gunpowder are just distant and inconvenient, not very different from traffic during the Mumbai monsoons.

Its easy to ask for peace when you are a thousand miles away from the Line of Control, and your primary concerns are which party to attend this evening and where to get financing for your next film.

Peace is not a punch line. It is the end result of war.

Major Gaurav Arya

Jai Hind


A Weekend Spent With Myself

Recently, I was feeling too clogged with the normal routine of my life which is – Home-Office-Repeat . So with this long weekend coming up ahead, I thought why not just grab this opportunity to do the things that I love and hopefully clear the junk from my mind and get back on the right tracks.

So, the first thing I did was to switch off my data pack. Without my cell buzzing & whirring every alternate moment, the feeling of freedom was finally sinking in.

GTY_woman_reading_book_jt_140112_16x9_992Reading: One of the first hobbies that I had developed. It’s like escaping into another world really. I just have to pick a book & pick a reading spot, I’m transported to a different world. For once I don’t have to worry about what’s going on in my life, I can embrace a fictional character and laugh with them & cry with them.
When I’m reading a book it’s like a Do Not Disturb sign. U can’t enter my room when I’m at it – gives me my Me time, u see.

Quilling: gives me great joy and pleasure. So, I spend some time researching for ideas & then once I sit down to do something…..I can’t get up till it’s complete.
WP_20150308_002This is a small wall hanging that I made for my maushi. 🙂
I love rolling and curling the paper & unfurling it & the dilemma of using the right color combo!!! Hell!!! M not much of a matching expert in that so I stick to whatever colors I chose first. And then once it’s ready….I can’t help jumping around the house & showing everyone my creation. 🙂

music-windows-wallpaperMusic: This exilir detoxs my mind!! Just need to run a finger up & down the playlist to select a song that suits my current mood & then m blaring the tunes full volume through my ear phones…& then I sing along with it too in my croaky voice but thank God I can’t hear that over the music 😛

better-dancerDance: I randomly switch to any music channel on TV & then copy the steps that they are dancing along to and within minutes our drawing room had turned into a dance floor 😀 and I’m like a disco diva in my head :D:D


Blogging: This has become one of my hobbies too now. I like musing over what to blog about. When some idea sparks in mind, it doesn’t feel that appealing so the mood dies down, like some switch is flicked off & then again something else comes to mind & then I delve thinking this could be good, I write random words & phrases first then slowly construct sentences & then once the words start flowing smoothly on their own, all I have to do is keep my pen moving along. 🙂

brunch-3Besties: Nothing beats a surprise visit from best friends. They came over with ice cream & chips & their warm smiles. And we spent the next 2 hours hanging out in my back garden, swinging on the swing chair & talking & laughing & teasing each other.

Reality TV: The only stuff I watch on TV these days. My brother and me divide the contestants into our own personal teams & as they compete on screen, we cheer & lead them on. Most of time we end up mock fighting as we support our teams. 😀

gift.wrapGift Shopping: The best thing about planning birthdays is that u get to do the shopping for gifts. Selecting an item & getting anxious over whether they’ll like it & finally settling on something and coming home to gift wrap it – Gift wrapping gives me a certain thrill like I’m wrapping happiness for my loved ones 🙂 🙂

The long weekend got over pretty soon 😛 but there was a tiny sense of happiness in me by Sunday night. Just maybe I finally found a little peace…..all by myself! 🙂