Mood diaries #1

Some days I want to be pampered. I WANT your constant attention. 

While on some days, I just don’t want you to look at me! Like leave me ALONE. 


​Scribed #5

6.30 pm

Without further prompt, she switched off her laptop, stuffed it in to her handbag along with the bottle and hurried away from her desk before anybody could call her back! 

Another day was over. It looked quite routine and normal on the surface just like everyone else’s but she felt the sinking feeling growing wider with every step she took. 

She had tried to start it with positivity, she reflected as she checked out at the main gates and started walking towards the bus parked on the other side of the road. 

She had put a lot of effort into the presentation, had worked on it for a week. But in the meeting, her manager started launching into an explanation of the product to the sales team. Her words. Her exact words. And the sales team looked very impressed with it. Just that the appreciation was routed toward her manager. 

At lunch, she sat between her friends while they were discussing their weekend. Miss Always-Out-On-Weekends was going on about this ‘marvelous restaurant by the beach’ which she visited  with her boyfriend and Mrs Family-Woman-Now was telling about how her daughter won the sports competition. She had no amazing story to share. Hers was a normal stay at home weekend. To which, Miss Always-Out-On-Weekends said sarcastically, “Wow!! Because the chance to do nothing comes very rarely kno?” 

And there was the topic she would not let her mind think on. Because every time  she thought about the way he left, she felt like – 

“What the hell!! ”

Someone had pulled her towards the side of the road. Strange, wasn’t she already walking on the side of the road? She looked up in the angry face of her colleague who repeated yet again,” What the hell?? Were you trying to get yourself killed? ”

Bewildered she looked back over her shoulder back to her colleague unsure why she was so angry.” Umm.. I’m sorry… What? ”

” Did you not see that car? ”

” Car??! “, she asked blankly. 

” Are you sure you are okay? “, her rescuer asked her. It wasn’t a kind question. Just an exasperation on having to intervene. 

She stared at her, tried to say something, hesitated then flashed her a smile and said in a rather high voice,” Yes I’m fine!! ”

Her colleague frowned at her and said in a little lighter tone,” U’ll be able to walk to your bus? ”

” Yes yes”, she smiled again rather idiotically and thanked her colleague and started walking towards her bus. 

At the door, she turned back to see her colleague had already disappeared like how the whirlpool of her emotions disappeared as if sucked by a plug – abandonment, betrayal, hurt, anger, dissatisfaction,  resentment, jealousy, fear – all pulled into itself in a wide sinking pit. 

​Z for Zest

Off lately, my interest in the things that interest me had dipped rather badly. I couldn’t find that eagerness I used to have earlier. 

When I started this 26 day Alphabet and  Feelings series, it was an attempt to put myself back on the blogosphere. And I want to say, I really enjoyed writing this series. A new alphabet each day – new feelings to ponder on – I have to sort of come to terms with what I feel.
And it would not have been possible, without the support of all you lovely readers who have liked my posts and left encouraging comments for me. Your reactions to my posts encouraged me to write further. 

So, Z is for the zest of all you readers. 

Thank you so much!! 🤗🤗